![]() ![]() Sometimes it makes you too careful and your past can haunt you but over all you expose yourself less, you protect yourself more, and you're aware of people's intentions. A man who you can see taking responsibility and being good at it. This means you're looking for a man who is respectful, honest, not a hot head, knows discipline, self-driven, family oriented, pushes you to succeed and stands by you when you fall. You have set such high standards for what you want and you know what you're looking for. You have an idea on the kind of man you want to spend your life with and what qualities you want that man to possess so your children can have a life you never had. Fortunately though, you have been introduced to the wrong guys and red flags early on so you have an idea what to look for in a person before fully committing or giving yourself away. Sure, something's don't work out but just because relationships don't work out doesn't mean the person you tried with was a disrespectful or a bad person. Now, in college, I can't ever seem to waste my time on the wrong people. ![]() Although, having to figure all that out on your own may just set you up for a brighter future than you think. You didn't know it at the time, so don't beat yourself up. You've never gotten to experience what it's like to disappoint a guy so when you find yourself in that position, you do what you feel you need to in order to avoid the conflict. Not always but even if not, they have a father who they're afraid of disappointing. Often the same girls calling you names are girls who have grown up with fathers and have never struggled with the emotions or feelings you have because their needs have been met on those levels. Girls will make you feel bad because if you make a mistake means that you are a "hoe". The way you should be treated, what to look for in a guy, what guys you should leave alone and how to say no. You see, when it comes to relationships you've never had any expectations or knowledge of what it should be like. In ways I didn't understand until I graduated and went to college. Starting in junior high all the way through high school was a struggle for me. Although this part is specifically for the girls. You don't even have time to understand that you're lost or making poor choices because you're too focused on figuring out the world that just doesn't seem to make sense to you the way it does to everyone else. ![]() You have a lot to learn on your own, from how to interact with people, authority and peers to how to respect yourself and others. What you didn't realize is how not having a father made growing up ten times harder. You would swallow the hurt, make a joke, or ignore the feeling and eventually forget it even exists. Except the times when you would see your friends hug their dads or hear them talk about how they couldn't live without them. You are strong, you are independent and you have to work a little harder at understanding life.Īt times it was almost as if you didn't know the difference of not having a father. You're not crazy or confused, you're not weak or behind. To those who have grown up without a father. Especially when those things have been missing out of your life, and that's all you've ever known. Growing up we are often not aware of the things that effect us the most. ![]()
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